First published in 1996, Jay Wiseman’s SM 101 has long been considered a cornerstone of BDSM education. While Easton and Hardy (The Topping Book, The Bottoming Book) focused on the psychology and relational dynamics of power exchange, Wiseman took a more straightforward, almost textbook-like approach: a comprehensive manual for people entering the world of sadomasochism and kink.

What It’s About

Wiseman wrote SM 101 to demystify BDSM and offer practical, safety-focused information at a time when accurate resources were scarce. It’s part how-to, part cultural primer, and part risk-awareness handbook. Topics include:

  • Foundations of SM. What sadomasochism is (and isn’t), common misconceptions, and the role of consent.
  • Safety and risk management. Covers everything from safe words and negotiation to physical risks of bondage, impact play, breath control, and more.
  • Psychology and communication. How to talk openly about fantasies, limits, and emotional safety.
  • Techniques. An overview of toys, bondage, sensation play, and scene design, explained in plain language.
  • Community. Introduces readers to dungeons, munches, and the wider kink culture.

The tone is clear, matter-of-fact, and occasionally clinical, reflecting Wiseman’s aim to normalise BDSM while addressing its realities head-on.

Strengths

  • Comprehensive introduction. Touches on nearly every aspect of SM, from negotiation to aftercare.
  • Safety-first. Wiseman’s background as an EMT brings authority to his discussions of risk and anatomy.
  • Approachable. Written for beginners, with no assumptions of prior knowledge.

Weaknesses

  • Dated references. Published in the mid-90s, it doesn’t reflect today’s consent frameworks, inclusivity language, or online culture.
  • Surface-level detail. Covers a wide range of practices but rarely goes deep into technique.
  • Tone. Some readers find it a bit dry compared to more story-driven texts like Easton & Hardy.

Why It Still Matters

SM 101 remains one of the first “serious” primers many kinksters encounter. It established a baseline of safety, realism, and consent at a time when BDSM was often sensationalised or pathologised. While newer books have expanded the conversation with updated language and cultural awareness, Wiseman’s manual is still a useful historical touchstone — a reminder of how far BDSM education has come and the principles that still hold true.

About the Author: Gareth Redfern-Shaw

f07a9e66e36af5cc2af7520e869d95465056b7784eabf0313e6bfdd370c8e8f5?s=72&d=mm&r=g
Gareth is the founder of Consent Culture, a platform focused on consent, kink, ethical non-monogamy, and the real work of creating safer spaces. His work emphasizes meaningful, judgment-free conversations around communication, harm reduction, and accountability in practice, not just in name. Through Consent Culture, he aims to inspire curiosity, build trust, and support a safer, more connected world.

Share This Story, Choose Your Platform!

Subscribe to see New Articles

After you confirm your email, be sure to adjust the frequency. It defaults to instant alerts, which is more than most people want. You can change to daily, weekly, or monthly updates with two clicks.

* yes, this is an affiliate link. I am not paid to create this site, write content, answer emails or calls. So please consider clicking my affilate links or buying me a cup of coffee.

Leave A Comment